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Quotes By Katrina #5 – God, What Are You Doing?

Quotes By Katrina #5 – God, What Are You Doing?


GodWhatAreYouDoing Have you ever wanted to just shake your fist and scream at God, “What are you doing God?!”  I know I have.  Many, many, many times – over both big and small things.  You know, when your son just won’t listen even though you have told him at least 10 times not to pick up the new puppy.  Or, why didn’t I land that job I interviewed for that I wanted to badly?  Or, how come her stay-at-home business is growing and thriving and mine isn’t?  Or, will this sickness for my kids ever end?

I totally understand and have walked in your shoes and am currently walking that road right now.  God is doing all sorts of things in my life that don’t make sense to me at all.  I have many moments of being so frustrated that I want to shake my fists at him and scream!  I had a realization the other day, who am I to question what God is doing?  He’s got me in the palm of His hand and has all the details of my life worked out long before they even happen.  He knows why questions go unanswered, why illnesses don’t heal and why relationships go sour.  AND, He’s working them all out for my good and instead of being angry at Him, I choose to Trust.  I encourage you to do so also.  Trust Him!

” I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. ” – Jeremiah 29:11

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January 30, 20180 commentsRead More
My 48 Day Journey – Change Is Hard

My 48 Day Journey – Change Is Hard

48Days-4I hate Change. Period.

I really do.  It’s super hard for me, always has been, hopefully it won’t always be that way. I’ve had a major dislike for change since I was a little kid. I would keep doing the exact same thing repeatedly just because it was comfortable and a lot of times I would hope for a different result. How dumb is that?! It’s like a diet – you have great intentions and think, oh this time I’m going to really get skinny! Then you find yourself doing the exact same things you have always done to try to lose weight.  You get up early and work out, you “try” to eat healthier, but in the moment, you find yourself still choosing the exact same food choices.   As a result you never really lose any weight, even though you keep hoping that you will still get skinny because you are trying so hard.  Why do we keep doing the same things and expect a different result?  If you want a different result you must change and not freak out about the process it takes to make the change.

“Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal.” –Robert G. Allen.

This whole concept of trying to find the work that I love is so hard for me. I love it, but I hate it. I feel like I’m on a journey of change and I find myself wanting to look back at what I’ve always done and keep hoping I’ll enjoy the result. Seriously, Katrina – get a grip! What is wrong with me? Are you like this? Do you hold on to a horrible job just because the idea of looking for another job seems too hard or too scary? Or the idea of having to change your work environment to something you are unfamiliar with, is worse than just sticking with the awful work environment. That’s me. I will keep doing the same thing, even if I hate it, or even if it’s not getting me anywhere just so that I don’t have to actually change. The fear of change is worse than the actual change itself. It’s just so silly. And who knows, what if there was something great on the other side of the change?! Like new friends, or a pay increase, or better benefits?

Dan Miller in his book 48 Days to the Work You Love, gave a great example of this. He talked about how a king put a big boulder in the middle of the main road leading to the city. Some people just walked around it. Others grumbled and blamed the king for making their commute hard. No one tried to remove the big boulder. Then one day a peasant came along carrying a giant load of vegetables. He set his veggies to the side and after much work he was able to move the boulder off to the side of the road. As he began to leave he noticed a purse containing gold coins and a note from the king indicating the gold coins were for the person who removed the boulder from the road. What is the moral of this story?! Taking risk can lead to great reward.

Let that sink in. Taking a risk, going for it, making a change – can lead to an unexpected reward. And that reward will never be a reality unless you try.  Phew! That’s a hard one for me.   A lot of time my fear gets in the way. Almost all the time my fear of the unknown gets in the way. This may surprise you, but it’s true. I’m such a wimp. I’m not a thrill-seeker at all. I don’t like change. I fear the unknown. I like control and feeling like I’m in control of what I’m doing – after all the only person I truly can control is myself. I like my feet on the ground, I like to know what I’m doing and what’s coming up. This love for control keeps me in a safe place a lot of the time and being safe is sometimes very boring. The love for control means I over-think and dismiss my abilities a lot to the time. I’m great at thinking of ideas for other people, but when it comes to myself I’m great at dismissing the opportunity. So silly and so sad.

A lot of people moan about their place in life or how they are stuck at their current job – but what are they doing about it? If you really want to change your circumstances, take a good look at yourself and your current situation. Then, decide where you want to be and take action!

I’ve had a lot of people ask me lately where I’m at on my 48 Days Journey. Have I figured anything out? I’m pretty sure my 48 Day Journey has gone past 48 actual days. And have I figured anything out? Sort of. Here is what I know so far:

  1. I NEED to work with people. I’m energized by people and relationships.
  2. For me “Work” is all about the people I’m working with – I think I can make just about any job fun if it’s with the right people. I’m more attracted to the people than the actual work.
  3. I need to be me – full of glitter and spunkiness, and I need to share it.
  4. I’m not afraid to be on stage in front of people, I enjoy commanding a room, I like attention, I like public speaking.
  5. I don’t want to sell – even though I can.
  6. I would like to work with my spouse again.
  7. I like the unconventional jobs – entrepreneurial in nature.
  8. I like to lead, but am not a visionary.
  9. I’m a great helper to someone who can take risk.
  10. I want a job with a deeper and higher purpose.
  11. I don’t want to go back to school.

It’s a frustrating list to write. I feel like it should be much clearer as to what I’m supposed to be doing with my life. I’m annoyed that after all this time and work on this book that I still don’t have a very clear picture of what my life’s work should be. I feel like I’ve figured out more of what I don’t want to be doing than what I do want to be doing. Maybe that’s a good thing though. I can think of a lot of careers that I just don’t want to do. I do know that for me, work is all about the people I’m working with – I think I can make just about any job fun if it’s with the right people. I’m more attracted to the people than the actual work. I’m not sure what this says about me, but that I put a very high importance on relationships. I already know that people are energizing to me and when I’m home alone for too long (like an hour or so) I start to lose my mind. What does that say about me Lord? Really?! Gosh when I look back at jobs I’ve had in the past I don’t remember the job for the job – I remember and love the job for the people I worked with at the job. Wow. Seriously, what does that say?  How do I turn that into a vocation with a direction of where to go and what to do? I feel desperate to have a direction…

So that’s where I’m at. I still dislike change and probably always will, but change is good and healthy and necessary to growth. I need to stop resisting it and search for it. I know I love people and need to be around them. I miss my spouse and would love to work with him again. I like high energy and fun environments, I love to make people happy and see them smile. I’m an excellent leader and self-starter. I love people that take risks and will support and help them take those risks. I love to help.

Seriously, this is so much harder than I thought it would be!

Thank you Lord that you have me on this journey and I pray you help me understand myself even better every day…I can’t wait to see what you have in store for me!

 48Days-4

 

 

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October 25, 20170 commentsRead More
My 48 Day Journey – “Ah Ha Moments”

My 48 Day Journey – “Ah Ha Moments”

48Days-3“God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.” – 1 Peter 4:10

I call them Ah Ha Moments – like a light bulb appearing over a cartoon head on TV – all of a sudden that moment of realization hits you – that’s exactly what happened a few weeks ago when I was sitting in the 5th row of seats at church.  We were a few minutes early and made it in time for the on-screen announcements.   To my surprise Dave Ramsey appeared on the jumbo screen.  Everything in life paused for a moment and my face lit up like a candle!  I caught myself instantly being filled with an overwhelming sense of longing to Dave’s energy and passion for what he does.  I’ve always liked Dave Ramsey – his personality, his passion, his energy, his drive, his overall message, his love for the Lord – all of it.  He even reminds me of my dad and I catch myself calling him “Uncle Dave” – even though I don’t have any relation to him at all (deep down I really wish I did though).

Dan says in his book, 48 Days to the Work You Love, that everyone has a vocation or a calling and you need to take notice of Ah Ha Moments in your life – this may give you a strong indication of your calling.  Those moments of deep longing, or when you are doing something and realize in that moment that you are doing exactly what you were born to do.  A calling is not something reserved just for pastors, priests and monks.  God places a calling inside each one of us with special gifts and talents reserved just for us as individuals.  We fulfill our calling simply by being exactly what God created us to be and by being excellent at it.

It sounds so simple, doesn’t it?  I’ve struggled with this idea for such a long time – trying to figure out my true calling in life and never really understanding what it is.  Half the time I always felt like people are “called” into ministry – but rarely  do you hear someone say, I’m called to be a mom or an IT professional.  Seems like you can only be “called” when it has to do with devoting your life to full-time ministry, but that’s flawed thinking – 100% flawed.  Think about it – God created everything and everyone and each has a unique purpose – God created trees to be trees and by that tree being a tree it gives glory to God.  The same is true for us – God created each of us unique and by being ourselves and doing to the best of our ability exactly what God intended for us to do, we will find ultimate fulfillment.  Whoa!  That was profound – even for me!

So, how in the world do we figure out our calling?  According to Dan it starts with understanding the difference between your vocation, your career, and your job.  I’d have to say I used the words vocation and career interchangeably – they seemed like the same thing, where in fact, they are not, and this understanding has again lifted a burden off me.  Your vocation is the big picture of your life – the overall direction and purpose, the thing you do in life that gives you meaning and leaves a legacy for generations to come.

The Dictionary defines Vocation as:

  1. a particular occupation, business, or profession; calling.
  2. a strong impulse or inclination to follow a particular activity or career.
  3. a divine call to God’s service or to the Christian life.
  4. a function or station in life to which one is called by God.

I define vocation as the overall direction of your life, your calling – that unique path for your life that only God could put you on – that “thing” that you were put on this earth to do.

Your career is an entirely different thing – it’s a line of work that you do for a certain amount of time and you can have many different careers in your lifetime.

The Dictionary defines Career as:

  1. an occupation or profession, especially one requiring special training, followed as one’s lifework.
  2. a person’s progress or general course of action through life or through a phase of life, as in some profession or undertaking.
  3. success in a profession, occupation, etc.
  4. a course, especially a swift one.

My favorite definition is #2 –  a person’s progress or general course of action through life or through a phase of life, as in some profession or undertaking.  “Through a phase of life” – this perfectly explains a career to me.  A phase of life – think on that.

When I figure out my vocation and the overall big picture of what I want to do with my life, then there will be many careers that I may choose to do that still fulfill my overall vocation, especially if I decide that the career path I choose when I was 18 is no longer the career I want today.  Take for example the vocation of “helping people” – that can translate into many different careers such as being a teacher, doctor, pastor, writer, entertainer, etc.  And that also translates into many different jobs within a chosen career path.  If you started out helping people by being a special education teacher in an elementary and then decided that teaching kids was not your thing at all, then you could change your career path by going on to teach college students instead or start a ministry where you are helping homeless people.  All of these careers still fall within the vocation of “helping people.”

I hope I haven’t lost you yet!  All of this is a like gold to me!  I feel like I’m learning about myself and living backwards – oh to go back to my younger years and do all of this in the correct order!  Oh well, I’m sure if I could go back in time, none of this would seem so profound.  Right?!  I’m hoping my journey can somehow offer hope to someone else in my shoes who is struggling with their calling as well.

Let’s also define a Job – the Dictionary defines Job as:

  1. a piece of work, especially a specific task done as part of the routine of one’s occupation or for an agreed price.
  2. a post of employment; full-time or part-time position.
  3. anything a person is expected or obliged to do; duty; responsibility.

A job is a job.  It can be big or small.  It can be fun, or awful.  It can be the best choice you ever made or the worst.  It’s all up to you!  And the best part, it’s just a job – so if you hate it, change it.  If you love it, turn it into your career and if it’s fulfilling to you, then most likely it’s right in line with your vocation and you can truly say it’s your calling in life!  I think most people live their entire lives never finding their true vocation or calling – not because they haven’t tried, but because they let life and circumstances get in the way.  There were bills to pay and kids to take care of and they took the first job they could make money doing so that their kids were taken care of.  Next thing they know, it’s 20 years down the road and they are wondering what happened to their life.  Maybe, it never occurred to them to look at their life’s purpose and seek to understand what is God’s best for them.  Please Lord, don’t ever let that be me!  I don’t want to be scared to dream, to wonder, to take a leap!

Dan says, “Jobs will come and go, but they should never derail you from the fulfillment of your calling.”

I think I’ve made it too hard for me to see my calling.  It’s probably right in front of me and has been all this time.   I must be making it complicated – as if my calling is not enough – like it must be more, or harder, or it’s not worthy of being the calling of my life.  Funny, when I consider who placed that calling on my life – who is the Master and Creator of ALL that I am?

“You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.” – Psalm 139:16

Lord, help me see it – help me see my calling, my vocation, the overall direction of what you want me to be and do with my life.  Make it clear to me and give me a sense of Peace when it’s resonated in my heart.

I’m still working on this one you guys…. I’m thinking and praying about it and will be back with my thoughts soon.

48Days-3

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September 19, 20170 commentsRead More
Let Jesus Shine Through

Let Jesus Shine Through

LetJeusShineThroughIt’s early March here in Colorado and that means everything is a still a little brown outside.  My son and I LOVE to be outside, so every chance we get when the temperatures are even slightly warm enough, we head outside to enjoy the sunshine.  I noticed some green grass poking through all the dead brown grass a few days ago while we were walking to get the older kids from school.  We both were soo excited to see the little blades of green grass sprouting up – that means Spring is coming and with that, warmer weather and even more time outside!

It struck me this morning as I was driving and having this long conversation with my son about the coming Spring, that we all need some time to clean up our lives so that Jesus can shine through.   You see, there was a landscaping company out with their blowers, mowers, and rakes.  They were cleaning up the neighborhood by blowing away all the dead leaves, and power-raking all the withered brown grass.  Their hard work was giving everything a fresh clean look, and getting our neighborhood ready for new life to grow when Spring truly arrives.

This reminded me that we all need a good power-raking in our lives, a time to remove all the icky, old stuff that is clouding our vision and weighing us down so that Jesus can shine through!  Just think of how hard it is to see the good in your life when your life is so full of hurt, pain, and sorrow?  Or when you are weighed down by a broken relationship?  Sometimes we get so worn down from the hurt in our lives that our light is no longer shining, I’ve been there and I understand.   It’s time to clean it up, remove it, mend the hurt and start fresh so Jesus can grow your life!  Spring is an excellent time to take a good look at your life and see if there are hidden places or very open places you can heal and fix so that Jesus can shine through!

“Don’t hide your light!  Let it shine for all; let your good deeds glow for all to see, so that they will praise your heavenly Father.”  — Matthew 5:16

 

LetJeusShineThrough

 

 

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March 2, 20170 commentsRead More
Snowboarding, Pain, and God’s Glory

Snowboarding, Pain, and God’s Glory

SnowboardingThe last 3 weeks have been hard for me.  I’m not sure if many of you know, but I went snowboarding before Christmas, and it was awful.  Why, you might ask?  It was my very first time on a board and I honestly didn’t stay upright on my board long enough to know if it’s even fun.  I fell so many times and I had NO idea that it would hurt as bad as it did to fall.  I kept thinking, oh it’s just snow, how hard could it hurt to fall on my very padded butt?  Ooooohhhh, was I wrong.

The first time I feel backwards on my butt it was like a rug was pulled right out from underneath me and I hit the snow so hard that it hurt from my bum all the way up to my skull, and I wasn’t even moving!!  I fell so many times my first day on the slopes that my body hurt in places that I didn’t know it could hurt in.  In fact, I only made it down the baby bunny hill two times the entire day I was up there. and after falling over and over and over again on the way down the hill I’d finally had enough.  Snowboarding might be fun, but I’m not sure my body can take really finding out for sure if it is.

You see, after that horribly painful day, my body was feeling very sore, but still functionable.  I continued with my regular running and exercise class schedule which has me working out 5-6 days a week for about an hour.  Then, I decided I better give this snowboarding thing one more try, but on a much smaller scale – so I spent a morning boarding down a very small sledding hill in my neighborhood.  Not nearlyl as scary and actually a little bit fun.  :) I made it down the sledding hill about 25 times before I was just tuckered out, but I had 2 really good falls on my bum.  My back hurt for the rest of the day and into the next.  It was so sore, but it went away and I kept up with regular life again.

A few days later, I got a bur in my saddle to start tidying my whole house, which you can read all about here.  I got so excited to tidy, that I roped my husband into tidying our storage room.  We spent an entire weekend buried in the basement, sorting boxes and boxes of stuff.  I went to pick up a box at one point and felt a pinch in my back that spasamed my whole back and it’s now 3 weeks later and I’m still dealing with it.  3 weeks!!! It feels like an eternity to me.  I know how dumb that sounds because God bless all the people out there that deal with chronic pain and injuries – I don’t know how you do it.  I’ve been to my amazing chiropractor quite a bit in the last 3 weeks and am eternally grateful to her and all that she does.  She has explained to me that back pain is complicated and can be extremely frustrating to deal with.  I’m not sure when my back with finally relax and calm down, but I spent the first 2 weeks babying my back and not lifting anything heavy.  Of course that also meant no working out or running at all and for me, that’s really hard as I love doing both of those things.

My chiropractor also told me that she is pretty certain the spasam is from snowboarding.  Did you all hear that?? Snowboarding.  From the continual falling over and over and over, that I weakened my lower back muscles so badly and when I continued with my regular life and activity it finally gave up on me.  You can’t fall that much and that hard without some serious damage being done to your body.  Shoot!  And to think I hurt my body this bad doing something that I didn’t want to do anyways.  Double bummer.  My attempt at trying to be brave for my kids worked, but I also injured myself and that is where God comes in with a life lesson.

So, Katrina, connect the dots.  What do you mean the life lesson?  Ok, I’m glad you asked….  I was at my Community Bible Study yesterday and was struck by a very deep answer to a question that I ponder all the time.  I wonder all the time what is God’s purpose for my life, and if I’m actually doing what I should be doing?

Isaiah 43:7 says, “Everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.”  Did you catch that?  It’s the whole created for my glory part.  It’s not about if I’m doing the exact thing that God wants me to be doing and trying to figure that one thing out for the rest of my life, my life is not mine to begin with and what I want for my life is not the issue.  My life is from God, created by God, given to me as a gift from God and the whole point of my life is to bring Glory to my Father – not glory to myself.  Like a smack in the face huh?  Yep, I know.

I know what you are thinking…you are losing me Katrina, what does that have to do with snowboarding and back pain?  Snowboarding was born out of my husband’s desire for our family to all go skiing together.  He loves to ski and he wants me and my kids to love it too.  The only problem, I’ve never liked skiing, so I figured I would try snowboarding instead because the kids wanted to try to skiing so bad this year.  It was doomed before we even went, but I put on my bravest face and tried.  The kids loved it, the husband loved it, but mommy had an entirely different experience.

While I’m proud of myself for doing something that scared me out of my mind, I’m super annoyed that trying something I didn’t want to do to begin with is now keeping me from doing things I love to do.  Me, I, me, me, me….that’s the problem.  I keep thinking my life is all about me and what I want.  I keep thinking that just because it’s my life that I have some right to how it goes.  If I was able to do my regular working out I would be able to drop those additional 20lbs that I was so determined to lose early this year.  Again, it’s all about me.  As I was sitting at Community Bible Study this past week God whispered a truth to me – the fact that my life is not mine.  My life is for God and to glorify Him with what He has given me.  Whether that is 20lbs heavier than I want to be or not.  It’s about my attitude and my gratefulness for what He gave me and how I use that for His glory.

Ouch.  Such a good truth though.

Snowboarding

 

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February 5, 20170 commentsRead More
Time To Tidy Up: Hello 2017

Time To Tidy Up: Hello 2017

TimeToTidyUpI’m happier than I should be that 2016 is over.  I have no regrets about leaving that year behind me.  It wasn’t a horrible year, it wasn’t a great year, it was just a year and I’m over it.  I’m happy to welcome 2017 and have high hopes that it’s going to be epic!  While I’m trying not to get ahead of myself or of what the Lord has in store for me this upcoming year, I’m still feeling very intrigued about what lays ahead.  Last year was an “off” year for me.  I struggled a lot with my emotions, my overall body contentment, and mostly with my sense of overall purpose and direction in my life.  Heavy stuff huh?  Yeah, I know, and it was hard to wallow through it all.  I feel like dreams I had built, toiled over, and angrily suffered through were laid to rest, friendships were built and lost, days of pounding my body in the gym were accomplished with not much gain, and I registered defeat in more ways that I want to count.  I learned that God doesn’t always write out His plans for your life on a neon sign, clear as can be, so you don’t mistake it – He just asks that you trust Him even when you have no idea what is going on.  I was in that space so many days this year that I found myself doubting who God is and if He really is there for me – and in all my days on this earth, I have never doubted God’s love for me.  Now do you see why I’m read for this year to be over?

I learned something else about myself that I’ve never seen before – I don’t function well in chaos.  I get stressed out really easy and it doesn’t take much for me to go from “good mommy” to “crazy-stressed-angry mommy” when the situation becomes overly chaotic.  When I get stressed, I instantly go into overdrive of trying to de-stress – I clean my environment, I yell, I get mad at my kids, I start making lists, little things out of place make me yell even louder, I demand that my kids pitch in and help me clean, I just turn into a crazy person trying to tidy up and ultimately calm down.  A classic example is everyday when my older kids get home from school.  They come in the door and set their backpacks in the middle of the floor of the kitchen and start unpacking them, wanting to show me everything inside – the craft they made in class, their math test, the art project they are working on, their spelling homework, etc.  All while my youngest (who has been home with me all day) is vying for my attention as well, wanting a snack, drink and to show me anything he can find at that moment to show me, plus he is usually singing a silly song about stinky farts at the same time (lovely – huh?).  While all this is going on, I usually have music playing in the background (yep, because I’m crazy) and am trying to prepare a snack so we all can re-fuel before starting homework.

This mom does not smile through all of this, nor do I patiently listen as they show me items, or do I calmly ask them all to sit at the table so we can eat a snack.  I try to take a deep breath, then my heart starts to beat faster as I get more and more stressed by all the chaos of kids, dishes, dinner prep, laundry, homework, shoes in the middle of the floor, backpacks not hung up, etc and I end up yelling and throwing a mommy tantrum trying to get everything back to a normal stress level.  This is so dumb.  It usually puts the kids in a bad mood and me too and then we all spend more time trying to repair our attitudes towards each other.  By this time, it’s 5pm, and I’m stressed and starving and all I want to fix my sour mood and chaotic feelings running through me is a brownie.  Yep, I love brownies – but you all know that.  I’ll make dinner and simultaneously whip up a batch of brownies.  You see where I’m going??  It’s a horrible downward spiral.  Chaos and stress are detrimental to me and where I’m going in life.   I know I can’t eliminate all the stress in my life, I mean seriously, I have 3 kids, life is going to be stressful, but I can help identify the stress triggers and work at fixing them.

A very dear friend of mine told me about a book she is reading, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, by Marie Kondo.  This book caught my attention because I love to organize and I love the feeling of a tidy house.  I love to discard stuff, sell it, and move on.  My house is usually very tidy – but it could be so much more simplified.  I’m totally hooked on this book.  I’m only about 40 pages in, but I’m hooked!  I’m going to spend the next couple months reading this book, doing what it says and tidying up my home, heart, and my life, and I plan to blog about as I go.

In her book, Marie asks “Why do you want to tidy?”  When you can answer that question you can begin.  For me, I want to tidy to because I want to have a clean and orderly house so that I don’t feel stressed out by my environment.  If I’m not feeling stressed out by my environment I can pay more attention to trying new things, having more fun with my family, eating healthier foods, getting better sleep, and overall being a better wife and mom.  I do believe that all of these things can be accomplished by having a tidy home, because your home is so much more than just the place to lay your head at night.  As a mom, it’s my work – it’s where I put my time and energy, it’s how I make money, it’s how I prove my worth, it’s who I am at this point in my life.

I’m hopeful that God teaches me a lot about myself and the deep-rooted reasons why I do some of the same things over and over and expect a different result.  I want change, which is really hard to say, because I HATE change, but I’m ready for it.

Have you read Marie Kondo’s book?  What did you think?  What did you learn?

TimeToTidyUp

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January 3, 20170 commentsRead More
Quotes by Katrina #4

Quotes by Katrina #4

It’s hard to remember this when you are deep into relationships with people around you.  Sometimes you don’t realize just how much people around you influence you, but it’s so true that negative people have a problem with every solution.  Make sure you stay aware of the people you surround yourself with.  Keep pursuing your dreams! Quote_StayAwayFromNegPeople

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June 18, 20160 commentsRead More
Quotes By Katrina #3

Quotes By Katrina #3

I love how true this is.  God is not impressed with your abundance or lack there of wealth.  He is much more concerned with your heart.  1 Chronicles 28:9 “…for the Lord searches every heart and understands every motive behind the thoughts.”  I’d much rather share the little I have with others than hoard a huge pile of wealth from others.  What about you?  Give generously and you will be blessed! GodIsNotImpressed

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June 16, 20160 commentsRead More
Being A Mom Hurts

Being A Mom Hurts

BeingAMomHurtsWhat is it about a child’s birthday party that can cause so much motherhood turmoil?  Forget about all the stress over color schemes, themes, balloons, food, to make a cake or just provide cupcakes, frosting colors, candles, games, to give out goodie bags or not, and the worst part of all – the guest list.  Serious drama and stress flows out of birthday party planning for me.

Let’s back up a few steps…something you should know about me and my amazing mom.  When I was a kid, my birthday parties were something I looked forward to ALL year long.  My mom would make birthdays super special and over the top!  Plus, she would come up with these amazing themes that she would manage to do on a very tight budget and she always had time to hand make our cakes.  I remember some amazing cakes…there was once an adorable Strawberry Shortcake cake that was a thing of fine art (that cake in the picture is my ACTUAL cake my mom made me when I was 3)!  I also remember the Barbie skirt cake, you know the one, where you stick Barbie on the top of a cake that looks like her skirt.  My mom was doing this 30 years ago, long before this idea was all over Pinterest!  She made birthdays a monumental event that made me feel like the most special kid in the whole world – even if not a soul showed up to it!

Fast forward 30 years later and my mom has successfully passed the birthday party baton to me.  I LOVE planning their parties, I love making a HUGE mess at them, I love seeing the excitement on their faces when their friends come over and truly enjoy their wacky mom.  I love personally hand-making their invitations, and spending hours and hours researching ideas of fun things to do during their parties.  I start planning their parties right after Christmas – 6 months in advance, and I’m not kidding one bit – this gives me 6 months to fine tune the chaos and find the best deals on all the supplies.  Plus, it takes us a very long time to pick out the cake design – and I’m the luckiest mom in the world because my mom still creates amazing cakes for their parties each year (plus, sometimes I even get to help – but my mom is the true artist for all things cake – I’m better with paper).

As you can see, I’m pretty psychotic about birthdays and I’m learning this year that I care about them so much more than my kids do.  While I’m glad to learn this lesson – talk about huge reality check – it’s still really sad at the same time.  And it should come as no surprise that I care more about who all can come to their parties than they do.  Which is sooooo silly!!!

More experienced moms tell me, “You will hurt so much more than your kids hurt, when they are hurting” – it’s silly, but it’s so true.  Classic example – remember that one time when you were younger and all the other kids got picked for the game of dodgeball and you were the last one chosen?  Ouch.  Or that time you were hoping the really cute boy would ask you to Prom – but he asked your best friend instead?  Or that time you didn’t get invited to that one birthday party that all your other friends got invited to?  (I was there – more times than I would like to admit – break out the Double Stuffed Oreos right now).

I’ve honestly not experienced this whole idea of ‘hurting more than my kids are hurting’ very much yet.  My kids are not that old yet – and my oldest is a boy – he just doesn’t have much drama yet – or maybe he just doesn’t get involved in it, but it’s happened a lot more than I would like lately with my 1st grade daughter.  School is hard for girls and the drama starts at a young age.  She has had a rough year, she tries to act brave when she’s not included with her friends, but I’ve seen the tears that she wipes away when no one is looking, and it totally kills me!

I’m learning that I really do hurt so much more than they do, which makes me feel like a total wimpy mom.  If my daughter can absently brush off not being invited to a birthday party, why can’t I brush off the fact that she was not invited?  I mean seriously, who is the adult here?  This is my time to admit just how human I am.  I’m still that kid who didn’t get invited to the “cool girls’” birthday party because I wasn’t stick thin and didn’t have long hair.  My mom likes to tell me that I was “too cool” for all those girls, but it still hurts when you are left out – and it still hurts you as a mom when your child is left out, not picked, bullied, etc.  I personally think it hurts us as moms so much because it feels like they are not picking us – even though it really has nothing to do with us!

You would think that as a grown woman I would have this figured out and would know not to take things so personally – especially when it’s usually out of no spite at all that our child was not chosen.  It’s just life.  Plain and simple.

My mom gave me some great advice and thoughts to ponder when you find yourself in this situation – because I’m sure if you are not in this situation yet, you will be soon!

  1. Being a mom hurts, but is so joyful too!
  2. God knows what is going on with each situation your child is in.  He is watching and is there for every part of it.
  3. God uses these hard situations to teach us about life and how to personally treat people.  Also how to develop compassion for others that we hurt.
  4. When you kids are hurt it teaches them what real love is, and ugly sorrow lets us learn the true meaning of joy.
  5. Our job as moms is to teach our kids from God’s perspective through these types of situations and at the same time God will use it to teach us moms as well.
  6. God loves you.  Before, during and after anything that happens, He loves you and longs for you to be loved by Him.

Isn’t my mom amazing?!  Now I need to let her advice and words sink in.

Hugs momma!  Praying for you all!

BeingAMomHurts

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May 23, 20162 commentsRead More
Comparison Will Kill Your Joy

Comparison Will Kill Your Joy

dawn-nature-sunset-womanDon’t compare your beginning to someone else’s end…

Since it’s the beginning of a new year, it’s that time when all your friends and business associates on Facebook are writing out deep thoughts and aspirations about all the amazing things they plan to do in the new year.  I don’t know about you, but this year I’ve not wanted to think too deeply about goal setting.  I’ve not wanted to jump on the “my plans for the upcoming year” bandwagon, and here’s why.  Last year, not a lot went how I had “planned” it to.  I didn’t reach very many of my big goals, let alone, my easy-to-reach goals.  Which is so not me.  I tend to make big goals and hit them, and if I don’t hit them I absolutely hit a whole bunch of my easier to reach goals on the way.  So this new year, I’m dragging my feet to even think about my goals for the year.

I know that comparison will kill my joy, but gosh it’s really hard to not compare where I’m at with those around me.  I see my happier, healthier, skinnier, wealthier friends around me and I can’t help but compare.  Her smaller waist and brand new SUV, and she just dropped off her well-groomed son at an awesome preschool, to my bed-head mis-matched son who rides in my recently door dinged older SUV, to drop off his siblings at school with a mommy who LOVES chocolate and ate way too much of it over the holidays because she wasn’t feeling all that well….yep, it’s my story.  As you can see comparison is killing all my joy, especially if I don’t look at the whole story.

Who knows where my friend is on her journey.  Maybe she has been starving herself for months just to fit into that new outfit, and maybe her brand new SUV was purchased with money that she’s been saving for years, and maybe her in-laws wrote the check for her son to attend that preschool…who knows what her story is!  The problem is you have no idea where someone else’s story began or how far along they are on their journey.

Your super-skinny friend may not have been that thin a year ago, and your super-successful network marketing friend who is quickly climbing the ranks of her MLM didn’t start out at the top – she started down at level one just like everyone else.  If you are just beginning a new journey, whether to a smaller waist, or a larger paycheck, or to starting a new business – just remember that your journey is YOUR journey and GOD is in control.  He is the author of your life and your plans and instead of comparing your story or lack there of, start focusing on being thankful for what the Lord has given you.  Be willing to learn and grow AND be content at every step of the way.  You do that, and you’ll find joy all along the entire journey.

 

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January 6, 20162 commentsRead More