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Why Do I Care What You Think of Me?

Why Do I Care What You Think of Me?

me_sadWhy do we care so much what others think of us?  Why do I compare my Facebook post that not very many people comment on with my ‘friend’ who has a bunch of people comment on every thought she posts?  For that matter, why do I care what my Facebook friends think of me?

Why do I catch myself wanting to change something on my website just because one person online wrote their opinion of something I said.  Needless to say it wasn’t a glowing opinion of what I said.  But why do I care what that one person thinks of me?  I don’t know them anyways, so why do I let it bother me so much?

Why do I care when a ‘friend’ whom, I thought I was speaking to in confidence, went ahead and told someone else about my concerns?  It hurts when you can’t trust your ‘friends.’  Doesn’t it make you want to walk around with tape over your mouth and never, ever say anything to anyone at all?  being betrayed is awful.  On the flip side, I know that I’ve also betrayed my friends before… but why does it hurt so much that they betrayed me?

I tell people all the time — I’ll introduce you to your next best friend.   It’s this talent that I have, I’m an out-going person, I know a lot of people, and it’s like second nature to me to connect people with other people.  Sometimes those people really have a lot in common and become really good friends.  It’s something I do without really even noticing – but I hate it.  I’m always the one left without friends in the end because as soon as in introduce them to someone else, they leave me in the dust.  And then I wonder why they don’t like me – but again, tell me why I care?

I know why I care.  I’m human.  People’s opinions hurt sometimes – actually they hurt a lot.  I want to be liked.  I want a best friend who knows my heart and keeps my confidences.  I want people to meet me, know me and know that I love the Lord.  Do you ever feel this way?  Do you worry what others think of you?  Do you wonder why you care so much what others think of you?

My advice to you: remember that you are special and unique and God made YOU to be exactly who YOU are.  God perfectly knit YOU in your mother’s womb to be the only YOU there ever will be.  He loves YOU more than anyone, or any friend ever will. Friends really do come and go.  Best friends are a true gift from the Lord and consider yourself very blessed if you have a best friend.

Psalm 139:13
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.”

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November 15, 20142 commentsRead More
Today Is Just Not My Day

Today Is Just Not My Day

Today is one of those days when I’m just not on top of it.  Bummed is a good way to describe how I feel.  I realized about an hour ago that I forgot to register for an important meeting for our business and now that I’m late in registering, I’m going to have to pay extra for it. Uggh. Yesterday my son woke up with the stomach flu. Talk about throwing your day for a loop. So I spent the better part of yesterday doing load after load of laundry to keep up with all the fluids he was losing. Not pretty. But on the flip side, I got to spend the day with my oldest son. He’s a sweetheart, even though he was so ill.  He is still home from school today, and it’s a whole different world when you are used to only one kid at home to now having two home and trying hard to keep them apart from each other so they don’t share germs.  On top of it all, I’ve lost my voice. Most people might think that’s God way of giving the world a break, but it sure makes it hard to make phone calls and ask your kids to do their chores. Plus, when I lose my voice that can only mean one thing – that I’m sick, sick, sick. And we all know when mommy is sick the whole house suffers – right? Plus it’s a vicious cycle – when I’m sick, I feel rotten, I have a short fuse, and then the kids are instantly in a bad mood because I’m in a bad mood, and then I forget things I need to do and the whole cycle starts again. Not a fun way to go about your day huh?

me_coen

But on the flip side, today is the day the Lord has made. I know what you all are thinking…”good one Katrina”… “way to sound cliché”… but it’s true. Today is exactly the day the Lord has made for you. He perfectly designed each thing in your day to mold you into the person He wants you to be. How you choose to react to each event that takes place in your life today is your choice, but the choices you make will impact your life deeply.

As my day draws to an end, I’m choosing to reflect on God’s word – Psalm 118:24.

Psalm 118:24
This is the day the Lord has made;
We will rejoice and be glad in it.

I’m thankful for the extra time I have with my older son the last two days – he’s such a great kid – I’m truly blessed. I’m also trying to ignore how much my throat hurts and be thankful that I can talk less and lead my children by example rather than by words. And as far as feeling bummed about my mistake with my business meeting, instead I’m going to be thankful that I forgot so I now know I won’t forget in the future! Take a moment to thank the Lord for your day and to remember that:

This is the day the Lord has made! I will rejoice and be glad in it!

 

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November 12, 20140 commentsRead More
It’s Not All About Me?

It’s Not All About Me?

It’s one of those days, when you feel like no one sees you. When you feel like no one is listening or even cares to hear anything you have to say…it’s one of those days when you feel completely sorry for yourself. It’s one of those days when you post a status update on Facebook and not a single person comments on it…and the sad part is that you actually posted a question hoping that people would respond…it’s been 6 hours and not a single response. Wow. Feeling very loved at the moment – nope, not really. Yep, it’s been one of those days.

Today is a day that I’ve been trying very hard to keep all my wheels spinning…I’ve done loads of laundry, I’ve vacuumed the whole house, I’ve kept my three year old entertained while doing loads of laundry and cleaning the house, I’ve made school lunches and cooked dinner from scratch, I’ve worked on my eBook, as well as wrapped Christmas gifts, I’ve returned a few phone calls for our business, I’ve also dropped by a friend’s house, gone to the grocery store and run all the way across town to pick up my wedding ring from the jeweler. I’ve not once sat on the couch to watch TV or eaten any Bon-Bon’s. I didn’t even get to take a shower, alone. Yet, I sit here feeling invisible and very sorry for myself.

Ever have one of these days? Are you having that day today? Well, mom, I hear ya. I’m right there with you, and I understand.

Now let me be completely honest with you. These are the days that I know I’ve not been in the Word enough. It’s days like today when it’s very clear to me that I’ve not spent enough time with my Heavenly Father. When I let the day press in on me and I let the craziness of life rule my attitude, instead of focusing on the Lord and choosing to focus on the blessings He has given me. Afterall, why do I want people to notice me? Kat_Kenz_wagonWhy do I care if no one on Facebook comments? My biggest problem today is – Me. I think it’s all about Me. Why can’t I just take a step back and be thankful for my amazing daughter who loves me and cooks with almost every night, rather than annoyed that today she’d much rather watch a movie with her brothers.  Why do I need a pile of thank you’s and compliments for all the chores that God has blessed me with the opportunity to do?  Afterall, He’s given me my kids to do laundry for, and this house that I have the pleasure of cleaning, and this great school that my kids get to attend, the ideas in my head for my eBook, and the amazing friend that I was able to visit with today, and joy of living less than 5 minutes from a grocery store, and the amazing husband that gave me my beautiful wedding ring! WHY, in the world am I making all my blessings a curse to feel sorry for myself?

My only feeble answer is that I’m a tired mom who needs to bathe in the Lord’s embrace. Lord, forgive my poor attitude. Help me to be exactly who you made me to be and be thankful for the blessings you have given me. Help me to remember it’s not all about me and that it’s really all about YOU. I love you, and I’m sorry.

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November 4, 20146 commentsRead More
How a Mission Trip Challenged My Dream

How a Mission Trip Challenged My Dream

imageMy family and I just got back from our first family mission trip to San Felipe, Mexico. Rather than play and hang out during Fall Break, we packed our bags and headed to some warmer weather in Mexico! Me, my husband, and our two older kids went along with 34 others from our church to Sonshine Hacienda, a small orphanage in the heart of the city. Our plan was to conduct a Vacation Bible School at the Hacienda and at a local pastor’s house, as well as do some construction projects.

I’ve been on several mission trips before, to Mexico in fact. I honestly wasn’t expecting to have an “earth shattering” experience – I knew what to expect, I knew we would be surrounded by poverty, I knew it would be dirty, I knew there would be lots of trash in the streets, I knew the public sewage system would have it’s limits and that we could not flush toilet paper or drink the water, and I knew that the kids would be amazing and that they would giggle trying to understand my attempts at simple Spanish. I was expecting all of that. And all of that was true yet again. It’s not that the Lord didn’t teach me anything and that I wasn’t impacted by everything we did. What did happen is that very subtly the Lord taught me some powerful lessons about myself.

I learned:

  • God has a bigger plan for my talents than I can see in my narrow “Katrina tunnel”
  • God made me. He uniquely designed me, my abilities, my talents, my thoughts, and the entire journey of my life
  • God has a plan for my life.
  • God wants me to share all of me, my abilities, my talents, my thoughts, and the entire journey of my life with others to glorify Him.
  • God solidified a dream that I’ve had for years and is calling me to fulfill it.

I know all of that can sound cliché’, but for me in midst of singing songs, crafting, coloring, playing games, and teaching kids about the Love of Jesus I was reminded that just because I can’t take the best photos of the kids, or run the fastest when chasing them outside, or sing in tune when we sang songs, God still gave me a lot of talents and life experiences that He calls me to share in the place He has planted me. Not everyone can drop everything and head to a far off place to “serve”. But you can serve wherever you are. God has planted me and my family in the exact place he wants us to be, in the community He wants us to serve in and although the “service” looks different than it did in Mexico it’s still “serving”. It’s the same for you to.

The dream I’ve had for years has been an idea swirling in my head – but it’s been an idea that was so disjointed. It’s exactly this – what I’m doing right now – it’s a dream to share my life with others. To share my experiences, hobbies, talents, ideas, and lessons with moms to offer encouragement, grace and a most importantly, help. Help to get through this thing we call ‘Life’.

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October 29, 20140 commentsRead More